Here’s a long story I’m going to tell,
About a guest from the Netherlands: ‘The guest from HELL’.
a girl of 30
haughty and shirtless
girlfriend of a rely
Who grew up without TV.
A professional girl with a Burberry scarf
She never said ‘thank you’, she never had a larf-
He never picked up the trash, the water wasn’t “hot enough” to bathe in.
Too boring conversation, she would have been snoring-
If it wasn’t for her phone… to use while *she* zoned-
Outside while others sat down to eat and chat-
She was honestly sitting at bat
Around Candy Crush, I saw her!!
She (really did!) described herself as a ‘whore’-
Before meeting her boyfriend
Apparently both tend
To fuck with whoever whenever
Disgusting and unintelligent.
Not nervous and cool
Horrible, immature fools.
A week of arrogance and denunciation
Everything was contaminated
*Apparently* (eyes roll)
Either that or not good enough-
For this special Dutch-
Girl with weird features
In his personality, and someone he hates
When your pancakes aren’t crispy…
I mean… *you* or *I* would think it’s RISKY!
March back into the kitchen-
Where the pancake maker was complaining
To serve pancakes for FOUR-
I was literally CRASHED
When she demanded more cooking
Of the pancake on her plate, despite the rest of us watching
For *our* pancakes that WILL NOT BE SERVED YET
Towards the rest of the whole herd
We had all put HER FIRST.
With frying pan in hand
The cook agreed to his demand.
put it back on
But wait… What is rising from within?!?
It’s Pancake Man surfing and stalking
on the border
He’s here to tell you that you’re terribly rude.
To scold her and say ‘Just eat your damn food’!!
He stayed a week and didn’t say ‘goodbye’
do not Cry
Since I had time to look
The number of times she never said thank you
I never said ‘Good morning’, I never pulled lines
With the rest of us, she didn’t give a shit
We were scum and she was ‘THAT’.
She stole some sunglasses that I left for her use
Just for the time he was here (!!), but he released them!!
Just in your case without me knowing it…
I was determined not to be seen showing-
ANY thanks to your hosts for the things they gave,
She thought we’d let it slide… but we were ready to save (mwahhaaa!!!)
They were vintage from the 60’s! not easy to find!
He was probably planning on gaining a few pounds!
From its sale on Ebay or Vinted or Depop
And now actually yes, she DOES have to leave
Return them to where we can retrieve them.
This is NOT… the person you want for your child.
Pancake Man got up to give him a warning:
Be humble, be kind, don’t be bored or yawn
All your life.